Something snapped in Le Terrible. I suppose I may be at least half to blame; I mean, I am the one who comes and goes constantly, leaving the country, leaving reality, but coming back and expecting our friendship to be the same.
Did I expect too much from him? 4 years of hard beaten friendship, hammered out of pain and experience, chiselled from the rocks in the deepest pits, we carved something rough but beautiful. Maybe I ignored the signs, the fact that every time we started hanging out again when I returned he would very quickly and regularly break up with the girl he had been seeing while I was gone. I should have left enough alone.
But I was proud of this friendship we had, the fact that we had managed to truly stay friends after dating. I would brag about it to people, tell them, Oh, he is still one of my best friends. We will be friends forever. Le Terrible and I, well, we moved past our differences. Aren't we mature?
Maybe it's true, maybe guys and girls can't be friends after dating. Maybe one will always be secretly still hoping, still in love with the other.
I thought I was the exception to the rule. Turns out I'm just the same as everyone else.
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